I am a “runner.”

That’s right; you read correctly, I am a “runner.”

I hate to run. Hate it. But, I better learn to love it since I’m a “runner” now. Running is like a cult, though, so I’m sure the Kool-Aid will be passed around soon enough, and I will drink heartily because I am a “runner” now.

I went to a very serious running store last weekend and bought very expensive running shoes and inserts. The inserts make it REAL. I am a “runner” now. The guys at the running store put me on a treadmill with a whole computer and video setup to evaluate how I run and inform what shoes I need—and inserts as it turns out. Inserts make it serious.

As the computer indicated, I run sort of on my toes. After all, I was a ballerina! The running store guys thought that was mildly peculiar. Dancing seemed to them as weird as their love of running seems to me. But, I’m one of them now. A “runner.” Get used to it!

Once I announced to the store that I was becoming a “runner,” people there—actual runners—were excited to welcome me into the club.

Me: “I’m a ‘runner’ now!”

Store guy, a runner: “That’s great!! You should come to our fun runs! They’re great! Very social!”

Me: “Social?! I’m way more into socializing that running! I’m IN! I mean, I’m a ‘runner’ now, but I’ve always been social!”

Store guy: “We have fun runs on Tuesday and Thursday and a ladies’ fun run on Monday. You should come to any of them!”

Me: “Whoa, whoa… This seems intense. Which one is the slowest? I’m just a novice ‘runner.’”

Store guy: “Come to the ladies’ run! That’s a good one, and we’ll make sure you’re in a good pacing group. It’s a nice, flat course they go on, too.” 

Me: “Like a really slow pacing group, right? How far do they run?”

Store guy: “It’ usually about 2 to 4 miles.”

Me: “That sounds long!!” 

Store guy: “Haha! You can turn back at any time.”

Me: “That sounds like quitting!!”

Social running seems like an excellent way to meet running friends, maybe even running guys. We’ll bond over being runners, and then we’ll fall madly in love and get married (and, obviously, engaged before I turn 33 on February 21, 2013). Maybe we’ll then run around a beautiful tropical island on our honeymoon!

So, now I have to train up for a 4 mile run so I can seem like I know what I’m doing when I go “fun” running and then really “fun” running on my island honeymoon. This “running” thing seems like a lot of work. And, training to meet a man! Sheesh! Maybe the “love” of the “run” will be enough, and the fiancé will be a bonus?

Well, either way, I have way more friends who will run with me than who will go to a dance class with me, and working out is always more fun with someone else. Maybe one day it will be a really special person who will work out with me! And then maybe he will be the one to want to go to a ballroom dance class with me because it’s what I like. “Running” leading back to dancing. I like the way that sounds.